yellow Daffodil
by Jenifer Ashley
Summary: Two years after Sirius dies, Ginny is realised from an insane Asylymm after cutting herself. When she gets home everything feels like home...but something just doesn't feel right. Mix in with the uninvited.


**Author's note: I've been feeling a little depressed lately so I've channeled my feelings towards this story. Thank you for reading. ________________________________________________________________________**

Cutting is the worst, it's like an Addiction. When you don't cut, you feel like you need it, when you do cut, you fucking hate it. I've never known something I could love and hate so much until he died. I loved him with everything I had, and he just left me alone. With nothing to remember him by but a flower. Not even a pretty one, an ugly yellow Daffodil. I hated that flower. And yet I've kept it all this time. It's inside of a book that I've never read. Every once in a while I'll take it out and yell at it. But then the orderlies come and I have to hide it again. This place is killing me. I hate it. But If I didn't have this place I think I would have killed myself. It all happened two about two years ago.

Sirius died, and I'd felt all alone, like everything I've loved was leaving me. I didn't think I just cut. Deeper into the flesh of my wrist. From one side to the other. I felt a mixture of emotions. Relief, anger, paranoia, depression. Everything just seemed to fade in to the back ground. I felt like I could never live again. The family comes to visit me everyday, but I can see on their faces that they think I'm still crazy. I never was crazy, just depressed. I've learned now that what I did was just a cry out for attention. Everyone was focused on Sirius that they forgot Ginny. So I cut myself like that so that someone would notice me. At least that's what I tell my therapist, six times a week.

Today I'm going home. My mother is crying over how thin I've gotten. My dad is being strong like nothing happened. Fred won't let go of me, and George is trying to make me laugh, Ron is waiting in the car with Bill and Charlie. I look around but one person is missing Percy. I look at my dad and see that he notices that I've made this realization and he sighs. "Percy wouldn't come. I'm sorry love." He says trying to be my strong father. I hug him tightly and try not to break down crying but the tears come anyways and the words flow out also.

"I'm so sorry you guys. I didn't want this to happen. I really didn't want to do it. I'm so sorry, please don't hate me!" I cry right outside of the hospital. My family was crying also. My whole family, just standing on the street crying. Muggels passing us by, no one seems to notice that we just came through a window. We stood there wrapped in each other crying. I've never cried this much in my life, except when Sirius died. My mum stopped her hick-upping and smiled at us. "Well let's get home before it's to dark to drive." She said with a small smile. I loved my mother. No matter how bad the moment seems she finds a way to make it better.

We drove home in silence. All my brothers silently saying welcome back. I was glad to be going home, but deep inside I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to make it on the outside. We got back to the burrow around 9 p.m. I breathed a sigh of relief when we pulled up and I saw that the house was the same as always. I've been gone for almost two years and everything is still the same. I was glad, I'm not sure I could live with anymore loses. My dad parked the car and we all got out. I opened the trunk and grabbed my one bag, full of clothes, and books, and other useful objects. My wand had been returned to me once I was released and it was safely tucked into the waist band of my pants.

I carried my little bag into the house and waited for my mother to come in. I knew she didn't trust me to be by myself lately. I'd have to prove to her that I'm okay. She smiled and we walked up the stairs and to my room. I set my bag on my bed and sat down. Everything was the same here too. I still had clothes lying on the floor as if I'd just taken them off. My bed wasn't made, and I had a book lying half open on my bed side table. "It's really good to get you home Ginny." My mum said pulling me into a hug. "It feels good to be home." I sighed hugging her back.

She started to cry and I wasn't sure what to do so I started to cry to. "Oh Ginny. I'm so sorry we sent you away, we didn't know what else to do." She sobbed clinging onto me. I didn't know what to do so I just started to cry with her. "I know Mum, It's my fault, and I shouldn't have done what I did. I was just confused after Sirius died, and everything." I cried not knowing if she could hear me since I was practically whispering. "It's okay dear. I'm just glad you are back that's all that matters now why or how, but now." She said pulling away and brushing her hand across her face. After saying good-night and giving me my medicine she left.

I lied in bed waiting for my pills to kick in so I could sleep, I starred up at the ceiling. Seeing patterns where there were none. The darkness plays tricks on you after awhile. I heard a knock on my door and then Fred walked in. Even though he was way older then me, for some reason me and Fred had always been close. He'd come visit me when ever he got off work so that we could have some time alone just to talk about life and stuff. I smiled and sat up in bed as he turned on the light and sat in my desk chair, and faced me. "You glad to be home?" He asked with a smile. "Yeah, compared to the institution this place is like a five star hotel." I joked looking around my smaller then average room. "Well, we are all very glad to have you home." He said leaning back in the chair. "Be careful you might fall and hit your head." I warned as the chair tipped to far back and he almost fell. "All done on purpose." He laughed setting the chair back on two feet. "Yeah, okay." I laughed throwing a little stuffed dog at him. He grabbed it before it hit him and he threw it back. "Jerk." I laughed as it hit me in the face. He stuck his tongue out at me then headed towards the door. "Night Gen, I'm glad you home safe, only now mums going to be stuffing you up with food, you're as skinny as a broom." He laughed turning the light off and shutting the door.

I laid back down and let my body relax its self. The pills started to kick in and I got nestled into bed and fell asleep. I was running away from something, someone was running next to me. I could hear their breathing and the thing behind us rustling against the ground. I looked over to my right and saw Sirius running with me. He had blood running down his face and his long black hair was matted and dirty. The rustling stopped and I ran over to Sirius and threw my arms around him. His lips met mine and we joined together. I couldn't tell where he started and I stopped. I wanted it to stay this way. I gripped onto him tighter but I felt something pulling him away. I looked up and saw a black archway with a clear curtain. It was as if it was sucking him into it. "Sirius no!!" I yelled reaching out a hand towards him. He reached out his and barely missed my fingertips. Then he was sucked into the curtain. "Sirius!" I yelled falling to my knees.

"Ginny!" A voice called from somewhere in the surrounding darkness. Slowly light filled into my eyes and I looked around. I was back in my room, and Ron was standing over my bed with Mum. My Mum looked white as murder and Ron looked scared. "Are you okay dear? You were screaming something awful." Mum said pulling me into her chest. "Yeah, it was just a dream." I said trying to tell myself the same thing. "Well, if you are sure you are okay, I've made chocolate chip pancakes with eggs and sausages so come along and eat." She said letting me go. She and Ron walked out and I stood up and got dressed in a plain black tank top and blue jeans then combed my fiery red hair into a pony tail then went downstairs and sat at the table.

Everyone was waiting for me when I sat down then mum set the food on the table and we all started passing around the plates. Ron passed me the plate of Eggs and I watched as his eyes grew bigger when he saw the huge ugly scars on my wrist. I looked down and took the plate and put a few eggs on my plate then passed it to Charlie. We ate breakfast in silence. Mum looked like she had some thing she really wanted to say and once we were done I found out what it was. We were all sitting at the table relaxing and letting our stomachs calm down when Mum stood up. She sighed and then looked over at dad then looked back up at us. "Everyone, your father and I have news for you." She said with a pleasant little smile on her face. "We are going to be growing into an even bigger family." My dad said standing up. "You're pregnant?" I asked looking at my Mum. She did look a little bigger around the middle. "Yes, about four months along." She said placing a hand on her stomach. "Bloody Hell, Now I'm going to have to share a room with a little pooper?" Ron asked looking dumbstruck. "Nope. Your father has some friends at work who are going to be building a new bedroom next to ours so that the little one can be close to us." Mum said with a little laugh. She was positively glowing.

After the sudden shock of the news I went back upstairs and took a shower then started to unpack my little back. I grabbed my underwear and socks and a black leather bound book fell out onto the ground. I placed the clothes into there drawer, then picked up the book. _101 uses for toad warts_. Hermione had bought it for Christmas. I've never read it but I kept Sirius's flower in it. I opened the book to the page where I kept the flower and I took it out. It was truly an ugly flower. Plane and Yellow, with nothing outstanding. I hated it and loved it all at the same time.

I held the puny flower between my fingers and twirled it. I remembered the exact day Sirius gave me this flower. He had been at the burrow for a short time, and I had already fallen head over hills for him. We had been lying around in the meadow out behind our makeshift quidditch field. I was falling asleep on his chest, my Fire red hair up in a pony tail. I felt him reach over then the next thing I knew this small yellow flower was dangling in front of my face. I loved this flower that day. I was brought out of my thoughts when my mother stuck her head through the door. "Ginny dear, we're going shopping for School supplies want to come?" She asked with a little smile. "Sure, let me just clean up." I smiled then stood up and put the dried old flower back into the book and hid it under my mattress. Then combed my hair down and went down stairs and waited for the rest of my family.

We spent the rest of the day shopping then around lunch time I realized that Harry Potter was with us. "Mum when did Harry get here?" I asked quietly as I watched him, Fred, George, and Ron drooling over a quidditch supply store. Charlie and Bill had already left that morning to go back to work so it was just me, Mum, Fred, George, and Ron. And now apparently Harry. "Ginny dear, he's been here since yesterday. He was in the car when we picked you up." She said with a concerned look on her face. "Oh yeah, I forget." I said forcing a laugh, then walked into the book store and started going through the list of books I would need this year. After we were done shopping for everything we went back home and everyone started packing for a new year at Hogwarts.


End file.
